Friday, 29 April 2011

Fuck Off We're Full

You've probably heard it, or seen it on a t-shirt teamed with footy shorts and double-pluggers, or on the back of a VN Commodore. I'd also consider it a safe bet that it's tattooed on more than one resident of Sydney's Sutherland Shire. I saw it (well, the last two words anyway) on the back of a motorhome recently and it got me thinking - just how full are we, and what can we do about it?

Australia ranks 234th on a list of 240 in terms of population density, ahead of the likes of Western Sahara, Mongolia and Greenland.

I'm not aware of any "FOWF" signs being erected on Ashmore Reef or Christmas Island, so I must assume that these concerned citizens are proposing changes to our immigration laws that cover all types of arrivals. If we are to limit our immigration numbers, we naturally need to deal with the main offenders first: the UK, New Zealand and South Africa dumped over 40,000 expats on our shores last year, with China, India and the Philippines adding another 38,000. I'll have a petition started immediately, demanding a suspension of immigration from the main countries that send us white people, and visit Cronulla Beach to ask for signatures. I'll let you know how I get on...

My first question to this trio would be, "Is that what you think Australia looks like?" - they were obviously absent on the day of geography lessons at school. I'll bet they dropped those ciggie butts on the sand, too.

I wonder if it works the other way - do residents of Western Australia draw a reasonable image of the coast from Esperance to Broome, with just a blob on the east coast?

Thursday, 28 April 2011

Quote of the Week

"SL, know that you are not alone in your mental illness. Many people on this board are affected, whether directly or through their family members."

- more from my friends at the Christian forum, Rapture Ready

Friday, 15 April 2011

Memories of Live Music

I recently spent a weekend away with an old friend who has spent his entire working life in the music industry, firstly as a roadie and now as a performance co-ordinator at a well-known theatre. We talked at length about performers we’d seen and, being the grumpy old men we’ve become, complained about the state of the music industry today.

In these days of iTunes and YouTube, the thrill of seeing an international act seems to be becoming a more mundane experience. Back in the day, even hearing them could have meant sitting by your radio and just waiting, if you didn’t have the pocket money to buy their latest album (I was never one for singles).

Therefore, as much for the purpose of reliving my younger days as for firing up your own memory, I herewith provide, in rough chronological order, the more noteworthy performers I’ve had the pleasure to see live on stage (some more than once)…

Jesus Christ Superstar – the Australian cast, pre-Marcia Hines
Linda Ronstadt & the Nelson Riddle Orchestra
David Bowie
Cold Chisel (twice in three days)
BB King
Paul Young
David Bowie
ZZ Top
Sandii & the Sunsetz
Ian Moss
Public Image Ltd
Cheap Trick
Alannah Myles
Simply Red
Tokyo Shock Boys
Sarah McLachlan
Natalie Merchant
Ani DiFranco
Cold Chisel
Dwight Yoakam
Marilyn Manson
Kings of Leon
Foo Fighters

Quote of the Week

"The reason I ask is because through the last 2000 years, millions have tried that very thing and have failed. The way I understood it, no one up to now had been able to find one single inconsistency. Now you can say the Bible is full of them, you might have to show me one, please."

- a member of Rapture Ready forum on the inerrancy of the bible.

Tuesday, 12 April 2011

The Human Eye – when did it go wrong?

The human eye has long been a favourite among creationists as an example of an organ so complex it could not possibly have evolved into its present form.

The fact that it’s far from perfect, with its light receptors facing away from the light source, and as a consequence having a blind spot being created by the hole in the retina through which the optic nerve must pass, suggests anything but a divine design. But let’s put that aside and concede that God did indeed create the human eye, along with the rest of the human body obviously, six to ten thousand years ago.

And thus, the “if/then” switch in my brain is tripped…

Ask any bible-believing Christian why the world is going to hell in a handbasket, and they’ll tell you it’s because Adam and Eve fell for, what is not just metaphorically, the oldest trick in the book – the talking snake. Everything was perfect until that little bastard slithered his way into the garden. Everything including the design of the human eye.

So I am obliged to wonder – if it’s not perfect now, and never could have been considered so in its present form, did the actual physical structure of the eye change as a result of mankind’s fall from grace?

Monday, 4 April 2011

The truth – does it really matter?

I get lots of emails, but my favourites are the ones that teach me about the way things really are in this world of ours. The ones that tell me why I should be frightened and/or disgusted by foreigners (or to give them their proper name, Muslims) or how our namby-pamby government is ruining our country (usually by letting in Muslims).

Now, most of these emails could be a lot shorter than they are. They could just say “I don’t like Muslims” and that would be enough, because what usually follows are either lies, illogical, or irrelevant. So why go to the effort if making it a lot longer than it needs to be? 

If we start with the original author (my apologies to any real authors out there – I don’t mean to sully your title by using it to describe these fuckwits) they know that the people most likely to be convinced, don’t need much to convince them or are stupid enough to believe anything, no matter how implausible, that appears to confirm the views they already hold. 

So they’ve got the mouth-breathers onside already, but they eventually aim too high and, with nothing in the way of proper evidence, start making shit up to try to convince the rest of us as well. But perhaps I’m being too harsh there – it may be that they know we won’t fall for it, and are simply looking to incite even more anger and intolerance toward their targets. 

Either way, at that point, the truth and logical thought go out the window. Just make your point, state the facts, and we’ll see where we go from there. But don't expect me to believe your shit if all you have as evidence is a load of bollocks.

Because their works are always forwarded by a third party, it’s usually impossible to know where it’s originated, but I’m willing to give credit where it’s due, and say that if you send it to me, I trust that you believe everything in the message (especially if it ends with something like, “If you care about our country pass this on”), and you’ll be subject to any and all ridicule and derision I would otherwise direct at the originator.

In future posts, I’ll be sharing some of the masterpieces I’ve received, along with a closer look at each one.

Saturday, 2 April 2011

You're not Alex Perry...

If you're going inside a building, and you know it will be dark when you come out, leave your sunglasses in the car. Or at least put them in your pocket.

Do not walk around, inside, at night, with them on your head.

You might think Alex Perry looks cool. He doesn't. And neither do you. 

So just stop it.